Monday, September 29, 2008

Beano




Two words for everyone.

STOP IT!

Stop the madness. Stop the panic. I've seen a herd of cows in a frothing mess. Not a pretty sight.

If you've filled up, do not go back to the gas station for one week. If you approach empty before that time, you either are driving an M-1 Abrams or are running too many freaking errands.

Shortly, I will take my quarter tank of gas and go out into the swirl of chaos in search of go-juice and the essence of the human soul.

In the meantime, feel free to feel the panic by checking #atlgas on twitter. It's shooting up the chart with a bullet.

UPDATE: I've stared the beast in the eye.

I cruised up and down around the spaghetti junction area to all my familiar stations - No gas. I then began to roam towards Tucker. The QT at Chamblee-Tucker/Pleasantdale - No gas. One lonely little four pumper Marathon at the intersection had gas but I chose to forego the already formed line stretching onto the four lane. It seemed an accident waiting to happen.

I held little hope the Shell at the corner of Lawrenceville Hwy and Main St. in Tucker would contain fuel and shortly my doubts were confirmed. As I turned onto Lawrenceville Hwy towards Decatur, I made a crucial decision. Estimating I had about 50 miles of gas left in the tank, if I did not discover fuel by I-285, I would head south towards Forsyth until an oasis could be found.

Then, in the shimmering haze of the mid-afternoon heat, it appeared - the Citgo on Lawrenceville Hwy near Brockett Rd not only had gas but empty pumps. It was like spotting a Triceratops strutting down Peachtree.

It happened as soon as I pulled up to an empty pump. Like sharks whiffing blood from an ocean away, every car who saw my turn signal began darting into the station hoping to claim any morsel available. By the time I finished pumping, every pump had cars lined up and the queue stretched out onto the highway.

It was a feeding frenzy. It was madness.

I left with a full tank and the knowledge that my machine, unlike many of the more feral autos, could survive for days without additional sustenance.

12 comments:

Rusty said...

I wonder how much gas people are using driving around looking for gas. And idling while waiting to fill up their tanks.

Amber Rhea said...

Yeah it sucks but I mean, a lot of ppl don't have the luxury of living close to work or taking MARTA (bc of our stupid ass government, but that's another story). People gotta drive places, is the sad fact right now.

Jen and Tony said...

Here's the truth.

If you wait until you're on empty, there's no guarantee you'll be able to find gas. And then what? You're screwed.

I realize this is feeding into the nonsense, but some of have 66 mile round trip commutes and can't telecommute to work.

griftdrift said...

I get what your saying. And I'm not talking about people with long commutes. But just based on my eyewitness account, it really appears that if people see a station open they immediately panic and rush to drain it dry. I have a strong feeling a lot of these people were not in desperate straights.

There is a really panicked herd mentality out there right now. It feels feral.

Sara said...

I really wish there were a bigger push for Atlantans to telecommute until this is over, if that is possible. I would certainly do it if my firm were being more proactive in promoting it.

Jen said...

"There is a really panicked herd mentality out there right now."

You're absolutely right.

After Tuesday, I'm sitting my ass home and not going anywhere till Friday night.

thomaspatrickwheatley said...

Jesus, not only do we think alike, but we have the same "Atlanta = Mad Max" twisted sense of humor. If the North and South Poles melt tonight, I claim "Waterworld," James!

griftdrift said...

I claim all the cigarettes and jet skis.

thomaspatrickwheatley said...

Does Tech have that urine-purification device that Costner used perfected yet? I'm just asking.

Amber Rhea said...

"You cannot pee into a Mr. Coffee and get out Taster's Choice! Folks, it don't work that way!!"

NAME THE REFERENCE.

thomaspatrickwheatley said...

Dana Carvey imitating Ross Perot! I pretend to know this only from googling the first sentence and finding just one result.

Anonymous said...

RE: Mad Max references.

Sorry, brother, I beat you to it.

http://blogs.onlineathens.com/node/437

"I have the sudden urge to buy a leather jacket and pants, a souped-up Mustang and a blue heeler."