Monday, February 08, 2010

Gonzo Lawmakers - Day 13

A daily recap of the Georgia Public Broadcasting show "Lawmakers". The show airs weekdays at 7:00pm with a replay at 5:30am the following weekday.

Day 13

* Lucky 13! And it's the end of the week - you know what that means. We get to see what Tom Crawford's wearing!

* The Guv wants to appoint four currently elected constitutional officers. Like a cabinet based system. This topic is really wonky and gets the insiders fevered, but it's going to get a lot of attention.

* House Majority Leader Keen likes it. Shocking. He admits there's no political upside in supporting this measure. Hogwarts foundations just shook from the shock of sudden honesty.

* Rep. Austin Scott. He's running for Governor and he's agin it.

* Susan says the thing is like a checkerboard. Strange analogy.

* Stephanie Benfield is agin it also. She's about as liberal as it gets. Good example of how this thing cuts across party lines.

* DOT is going to reverse its position to use accrual (not cruel accounting, although some might say that also applies) and go back to a cash based system.

* Lara Fawaz live at Hogwarts. This is an awfully dense topic for one of the kids so let's see how this goes.

* It's also pretty tough to say "accrual". And she's saying it a lot. We finally get footage of the spanking given to the DOT Board Chair.

* Sen. Jeff Mullis is already quoting country songs. When they start pulling from their favorite poets of heartache, you know you're in trouble. The DOT Chair looks like he'd rather have rattlesnakes put in his shorts.

* How do you tell the depth of iPhone penetration? By the number of people tapping away on them as the politicians drone on in a committee meeting.

* Lara got the scoop that they were going back to the old system. Nice job, kid!

* We needed a bill to allow the Drivers Services to change a drivers license number if it has been lost or stolen? Good lord, there are stinkbombs like this roaming around and we're busy talking about non-existent microchips implantations?

* More retirement loophole closing. Yawn.

* Only one bill in the House and it deals with putting something on a website instead of mailing it. Guess they have to fill 30 minutes somehow.

* Scowling House clerks! The streak continues!

* Tom Crawford time!

* Oh Tom. Not a paisley tie with a striped shirt! Is that some homage to the Lawmaker Flashbacks from the 70s?

* Now I'm having a flashback. The way Tom's striples are "moving" due to the camera, I feel like I'm back in college when we would conduct certain chemical "experiments". Cue the Pink Floyd.

* Some committee meeting about disability rules. Can't follow. Still woozy from the Crawford segment.

* Lawmakers Flashback! Denmark Groover! Awesome! We're up to 1984. And it's a bill about wiretapping. As Sting would say "synchronicity"! Talk about drug dealing, narcotics, a little bit of gambling. Ah, those were the days. They are explaining "Grooverizing". I'll get into that some other time.

* Black History Month moment. It's about the state flag. And peanuts. And they interspliced black and white clips. The whole thing's a little strange but tt's actually a good story. Rep. Joe Wilkinson's relates how he was there as a Cub Scout the day the Confederate Battle Flag version of the state banner was unveiled. On the way out, his mama went up to a black peanut vendor and bought every last one of his roasted legumes. When asked why, she responded because that flag was meant to hurt people like the peanut man. Awesome.

* Tape disaster! And we get to hear the floor director scream "coming back, coming back!" It was going to be the week in review, complete with fancy slides. I'm sure we'll see it shortly.

* Quick pivot to some weird bill about putting locks on cars so drunks can't crank 'em up. And we have a new kid! Hello Adam Bridges! Good lord. Is he old enough to be on tv?

* Here's the weekly wrap up tape again. And it froze again. Poor babies! Bring in the exocist and get that thing cleansed! They finally got it going but it's fightin' em! Fight that tape machine! Fight it good!

* Tape machine wins. I'm willing to bring my chicken bone cross down there if necessary.

* And it eats the next story too! The savage beast will not be quelled!

* They finally got it going and Sen. Valencia Seay is trying to get old white dudes to wear red dresses to raise awareness for women's heart health. I'm seriously starting to wonder if the Wendy's slipped something pharmaceutical in my co-cola.

* Here's Ricky Bevington and her Book of Doom! Sen. Saxby (R-Griftdriftland) is drawing fire from the conservative blogs for his weird remarks about Don't Ask Don't Tell. Shout out to Jason Nye! Oh lord. Jason finally gets a little pub and they got his name wrong. And they segue to the Imperial Sugar explosion. Yeah. That wasn't intentional. If you don't remember, Saxby took some heat over some campaign donations from that industry. The UGA Athletic Director gets a raise. No one else on campus gets a raise. Awesome.

* Lawmakers will not be seen ono Saturday or Sunday. Because they have to squeeze in This Old House and History Detectives. That's the end of the week and that's a wrap!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

* Tape machine wins. I'm willing to bring my chicken bone cross down there if necessary.

* And it eats the next story too! The savage beast will not be quelled!


BEST....RECAP.....EVAR

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The Smoking Cupcake said...

Please keep transit on your mind as you report during this and upcoming sessions...www.actnowga.org!

Great line about Mullis and rattlesnakes...

The Smoking Cucpake
www.thesmokingcupcake.com